I Love You To The Moon and Back
by GhostlyMayhem
Summary: Zim squeezed the tiny hand in his. "...please, Gir... I really need you... you can't leave me..." AU. Based on the song "Ronan" by Taylor Swift. Humanized Zim and Gir. ZaGiF. ZaDF. NO ROMANCE.


**NOTE: Totally and completely AU, so it doesn't go into my other IZ stories. Also, Zim and Gir are humanized in this... So it makes sense. Anyway: let the tears begin...**

**...**

**I Love You To The Moon and Back**

_'I remember the last day, when I kissed your face_ _and whispered in your ear..._  
_Come on baby with me, we're gonna fly away from here._  
_Out of this curtained room and this hospital gray_  
_We'll just disappear. _  
_Come on baby with me, we're gonna fly away from here_  
_You were my best four years...'_

_- "Ronan", Taylor Swift_

**...**

The little hand gripped tightly in his felt cold; much colder than a child's hand should be. Normally those tiny hands were always so warm, full of life... Now they were cold and pale, losing life. Zim could see it on the child's tiny face as well, on the round cheeks still held together by baby fat; the loss of their usual rosy, upbeat color, dulling into a pale white, almost grayish tone. The child's half-lidded eyes, just barely open, revealed the two shiny blue eyes staring blankly up at the ceiling. Those lively blue eyes that usually sparkled in the sun were dying out, losing their spark.

Gir was losing his battle.

And a long battle it was. It started nearly a year ago, and now it was quite evident that the battle would soon come to it's tragic end. Zim had been sure his little brother could fight this thing, especially since he was there by the child's side from the very beginning, silently cheering him on to win, to conquer his illness that had already taken so many lives. But now, according to the doctors, Gir didn't have long to live. Any day now it would all be over, and not in the way Zim had hoped.

However, despite how many doctors -trained and professional as they were- told him that his little brother was to die any day now, Zim regarded them as wrong. As stubborn as he was, Zim refused to believe their words. In all honesty, a world without his sometimes irritating but loving and care-free little brother seemed like a dark, cold and unfair world. Yes Gir was sometimes a nuisance and could drive Zim up a wall, but the little boy was one of the most innocent and purest beings on Earth. Gir never judged a soul and loved everyone... And _this_ was how he was being repaid? By suffering months on end in agony and sickness? Zim felt his eyes narrow, the tears stinging the corners of his eyes dripping freely now, despite his best attempts to hold them back. It just wasn't fair. This wasn't fair. Gir was such a gentle soul suffering a cruel fate; the illness seeming to eat him alive from the inside. He gripped Gir's hand tighter.

During Gir's first official move to the hospital for those months of hopeless chemotherapy, Zim hadn't gone to Skool. Not once. He didn't want to leave Gir's side; not once. It was to the point where he was nearly living in that hospital with his little brother. The hospital staff didn't want him staying permanently, but they would let him spend some nights there to keep his sickly brother company. Zim was at least grateful for that, which surprised him since it seemed like now... now it didn't seem like he could be grateful for anything. How could he? The last few months were spent watching his little brother suffer. He couldn't be happy or joyful; he felt angry and upset, yet for Gir's sake he would try to talk to him, comfort him in his pain with stories. Lucky for Zim, he could make up any story and Gir wouldn't mind. The little boy loved when his older brother told him stories, and it was the only thing keeping Zim from going into a fit of rage from the cruelty and unfairness of it all.

He opened his mouth to speak, to at least say something, but like always (especially lately) nothing came to mind. He felt his throat clench as he caught sight of Gir's now bald head, covered with a green beanie, where a head of shiny silver hair used to be. It had to be shaved off. _He doesn't look the same..._ Not now especially, with those once rosy cheeks now grey and seemingly lifeless, those bright blue eyes losing their shine. The anger and the pain welled up in Zim's chest once more, and to keep from bursting into either a violent anger or uncontrollable tears, he decided to speak his mind, "You have to keep fighting this, Gir... I'm counting on you to push through and beat this illness."

Gir didn't have any strength left in him to even speak. For a moment he tried, stirring a bit, but his vocal cords strained, almost painfully, when he tried to speak.

Swallowing back a lump forming in his own throat, Zim squeezed the tiny hand in his. "...please... I really need you... You can't..." curse the illness and curse the hot, stinging tears trailing down his cheeks, now in rivers. "...leave me..."_ You're all I have left._

He stuck to that one phrase mentally. _You're all I have left... You're all I have left._ It repeated, over and over until it began spilling past his lips from their original tomb that was buried deep within his mind. "You're all I have left... You're all I have left..." it became jumbled and mumbled, his mind on the breaking point. He let go of Gir's hand, instead standing up, leaning over the child. He leaned down, wrapping his arms around Gir in the process, repeating those five words as he did so. "...you're all I have left..."

He stayed that way for a long time. Any day now, this was supposedly going to end. And Zim, despite his denial, didn't feel prepared for the days to come.

"Zim?"

A sudden voice from behind caused Zim to jolt up, startled by the voice. It took a moment for him to realize who the owner of the voice was, and when it sunk in, he quickly wiped at his eyes with his sleeve, sniffling to keep the tears down. After a moment, he turned, narrowing his eyes at the figure standing in the doorway. "What are you doing here?"

Sixteen-year-old Dib Membrane knew when something was up; he knew that an unexplained change in someone's daily patterns usually meant that there was something wrong. And there had been something wrong, as it turns out. "You weren't in Skool for months, Zim. I got curious." His expression wasn't as nonchalant as his tone; he appeared solemn, regret noticeable in the brown eyes hidden behind the glasses.

Zim wanted to start yelling at his long time enemy; to take his anger out on someone. But for Gir's sake, he kept his voice low but threatening as he spoke, "Well, now you know. You can leave now, Dib. We don't want your pity."

To Dib, the little boy lying in that hospital bed with tubes up his nose and a hat covering a head that was once covered with silver hair didn't appear to be Gir. That couldn't be Zim's overly-ecstatic and bubbly little brother. The little boy on the bed seemed lifeless and- he didn't dare finish the thought. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"Because it's none of your business!" Zim snapped loudly. Gir moaned at the sudden sound, and Zim quickly lowered his tone, "Why would any of you care, anyway? You hate me."

"Yeah, but..." Staring at Gir caused Dib to think of Gaz. In all honesty, as an older brother himself, he couldn't even imagine what Zim was going through. "...I wouldn't even wish this on you. No one deserves this. Especially not him." Dib motioned toward Gir with a solemn nod.

Zim only glowered at the big-headed boy staring back at him. "You don't know what it's like, Dib. You have no right to show us pity."

At first, Dib wasn't sure how to respond to that. This was rather true in some cases of grief. Showing remorse for someone else's tragedy. It was almost as though most did it because they felt it was required in society. Dib however did feel deep, real remorse, even for his enemy. "You're right. I don't know what either of you are going through... but..."

"But what?" Zim snapped.

"...But..." Dib bit his lip. "I'm an older brother too. You know that. And I can't even imagine what you're going through right now... and I feel awful for you two. I do. I really do..." He paused for a moment. "But honestly... I think if you talked to someone, it might help you... even if only a little."

Zim only continued to stare at Dib with that same sullen expression.

"...If I were you, I'd at least try to come back to Skool tomorrow," Dib offered. "It might help to get away from this dreadful hospital environment." When Zim didn't respond, Dib turned away, heading back toward the door. He glanced over his shoulder at the other boy. Zim continued to stare at him, but his expression had lost it's fierce touch. He seemed lost, almost as though he were deep in thought.

Dib quietly opened the door and walked out without another word.

* * *

**A/N: I haven't written any ZaGiF, and that happens to be one of my favorite friendships on the show. They're more like brothers, really. Zim is the big brother and Gir is the little brother... Their brother-like relationship reminds me of my relationship with my six-year-old brother: he annoys me but I love him to death and will protect him with my life.**

**The reason I haven't written any ZaGiF is because I haven't had any ideas. And I'm all for angst, but again; lack of ideas. X(**

**...Until I heard "Ronan" by Taylor Swift and this idea was born. (note, I'm not a fan of her music. The only two songs that I like from her are "safe and sound" and "Ronan". Only those two.**

**Like I said at the top, Zim and Gir are human in this. So it makes sense for Gir to actually be sick and such... Zim and Dib are sixteen, and Gir is around four. And this is AU, too.**

**Anyway, this might be a two-shot or a three-shot. Please review if you liked it so far!**


End file.
